“Fetal Position” spoilers below:

Things that happened

Some lady, who I thought was a librarian, collapses. I wasn’t really paying attention, because I have night class on Tuesday and just got home and needed a sandwich. After commercials, I learn the librarian lady is a pregnant photographer named Emma who had a stroke. She is also over 40 and the baby’s father is a gay neurosurgeon who did it in a cup for Emma. How did that work and not the 4 IVFs she tried before? She really should give Cuddy tips.Emma’s kidneys are failing, and Cameron, Chase, Foreman and their fearless leader rule out all non-pregnancy relate possibilities. The fetus is killing her. This can’t be good. Also, Cameron is all pissy House hasn’t said anything about seeing her and Chase making out in the janitor’s closet and Cuddy is freaking because she totally sees herself in Emma’s position and is not being objective at all. House doesn’t care, he wants to solve the case and go on vacation.

She has Mirror Syndrome, otherwise known as my-baby-is-killing me syndrome. House decides to paralyze the fetus in order to see what is wrong with it and fix it. Or what’s wrong with him and fix him, if you are on Cuddy’s side. Apparently the baby’s bladder is gigantic and is preventing the lungs from growing properly. This is also easily fixable. Hooray! But wait, it’s only 15 minutes into the episode and there is no way Chase-Cameron drama can fill the next forty-five minutes on its own.

House tells Cuddy about Chase/Cameron and Cuddy tells Cameron to end it, because she’s a sexist bitch. Actually, I take that back. Cuddy has a point, but does so a little rudely, and Cameron responds just as rudely. However, Cuddy might be wrong about her assumption as to who will get hurt. Cameron really seems to be about the House and using Chase, but hey, this could be diversion.

During witty banter, where Emma takes pictures and totally realizes Chase luuuuuvs Cameron, she goes all crazy yellow on them. She is jaundiced and her liver is dying. This means the baby is still being really mean to its/his mom. If it/he’s this nasty now, imagine the terror he will be when he’s all grown up.

House is convinced they can’t save the baby and the mommy, and wants to terminate the pregnancy. All the symptoms are solidly pointing towards Emma dying in the next two days and Cameron, Chase and Foreman all agree. Cuddy, however, doesn’t. Neither does Emma. She’s pretty much willing to die for this baby. Why aren’t more older wannabe moms looking at adoption as an option? All this life-threatening stuff can’t be good. Cuddy goes all House-like on everyone and forces them to rethink the diagnosis. They refuse and it’s wild-eyed renegade Cuddy on her own. The followers even try to get Wilson to reason with her and to no avail.

Cuddy keeps pushing and pushing, and gets the baby’s lungs to expand enough to get a diagnosis. She also somehow convinces House to treat the fetus like a baby — although I think House agrees so the baby will die and he can be all “I told you so” – and they agree to preform exploratory surgery on the fetus.

During surgery, the fetus grabs House’s finger in a contrived-yet-moving scene. Emma also almost dies, and the Cuddy/House abortion/life debate reaches a climax and Cuddy wins. Also, they save the baby and save Emma. Hooray! Also, Cuddy buys House vacation tickets, but he rips them up, preferring to spend his two weeks sitting on his couch watching the Discovery Channel.

Things that were good

• This episode was waaaaaaay better than last week’s. Hooray for that!
• This Cameron/Chase thing is playing out far better than I expected. It’s going to get messier – Chase luuuuuuuuuuvs her – but I’m not scared of it anymore.
• House hanging out in a pressure chamber for the hell of it. I love this man.
• Chase’s sweater-vests steal every scene they are in.
• This episode did a good job with dealing with the philosophy and ethics of whether or not a fetus is a life without being all preachy. I’m glad Cuddy saved her patient, but I do hope she learned a lesson about being objective and not putting your needs ahead of the patient’s. That being said, I do hope Cuddy gets a baby. I love Cuddy.

Things that were not so good

• Considering Emma is a photographer, all the photos they showed weren’t very good. I’ll blame the stroke and illness and the near-dying stress though.
• Cuddy not being aware in any form she was being irrational. I would have been okay if she was like “Yeah, this is crazy, but I need to do this” instead of trying to throw House’s methods in his face. The situation isn’t really the same, given how House views fetuses (feti??)
• Cameron being all snippy. 1) Cuddy is your boss. You have to be nice to her. 2) You HAD SEX AT WORK. If that doesn’t break like five codes of ethics as well as several health regulations, you work at one crappy hospital.

Worth watching if….

……you want to see Chase in luuuuuuv and see the emotional, crazy side of Cuddy. This episode did a really good job of bringing out different aspects of these character’s personalities, which is one of the best parts of House. These are amazing, dynamic characters, and as long as they don’t have any more plot-lines involving House’s urine, I’m going to keep watching. You should too!

In Five Words

It Has the Teeniest Fingers

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