Spoilers for “midnight to 1 a.m.” below.

(Continued)

“House Training” spoilers below:

(Continued)

A few weeks ago, Disney announced its latest movie project: a story about a frog princess set in New Orleans. You probably have heard of this, partly because its Disney’s return to the classic 2-dimensional movies I grew up on (and loved dearly) and partly because Disney proudly– and loudly– declared that the movie would have Maddy, Disney’s first black princess. Hooray!

I’m completely torn here. While I do think it is a good thing to expose young girls to racially diverse princesses, the need for a core princess-heroine is in every film troublesome. Also, it is just a little late to be patting yourself on the back because you introduced a black princess. Hell, they did mermaid before they did ethnic minorities. Mermaids everywhere considered this a huge step forward. (Edit: I know that joke is old now, but I actually wrote this post months ago and just never got around to posting it. So it stays.)

Additionally, the princess being black and the film being set in New Orleans raises other identity awareness and political issues as well. Why New Orleans? Why now? Is Disney really this desperate? Or are they making a positive statement and reclaiming New Orleans as a positive cultural space? And can you really claim you have a progressive and unique outlook on the princess landscape, when the film takes place in a region that is predominantly African- American? How progressive is it to be accurate?!

However, Be-Something is not the place to have aggressive political debates about the Disney-fication of the universe! No! Instead it is the place to celebrate frivolousness and television and yes, even ‘Happily Ever After’ regardless of how contrived it may be. Because, no matter how controversial Maddy may be, we know the following: she will be able to talk to animals, she will find true love, she will teach young girls about the importance of individuality, strength, intelligence and having inner and outer beauty, she will teach us that being abrasive and whorish is in fact a form of feminine empowerment, and she will have a lot of hair.

So grab your tiara (and a boa if you have one), pour some tea, it’s time to explore the 10 best Disney princesses of all time!

(Note: I am beginning to feel really lame when Matt gets awesome top tens like “Fictional Irish Characters” and “Nintendo Romances” and I get ones involving cartoon princesses and Full House.)

(Continued)

“Good Doing Business with You” spoilers below:
(Continued)

“Cleveland” spoilers below:

(Continued)